


Welcome to Whatever This Is

by nojamsjimin



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Baekhyun just wants friends, Chatting & Messaging, Eventual Romance, Everyone Is Gay, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Humor, I Don't Even Know, I'll add more tags later I guess, I'm basically plagiarizing off my other chatfic but sshhh, Kim Jongdae | Chen is So Done, M/M, Oh Sehun & Do Kyungsoo | D.O are Best Friends, Save Suho from everyone, Slow Burn, Texting, bc I'm just a bucket of laughs, yes it's me again back with another chatfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-06-24 10:07:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15628395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nojamsjimin/pseuds/nojamsjimin
Summary: As a clever plan to make friends in his first year in college, Baekhyun decides to trick people into giving him the numbers of some of their friends, claiming it's all for some "social experiment." And it works a lot easier than he expected it to.Baek_again:byun baekhyun at ur servicetolgayandhandsome:at my service?nicecould u order me some thai foodI haven't eaten in twelve hoursBaek_again:byun baekhyun at ur service, so long as ur requests don't involve manual labortolgayandhandsome:it's not manual labor I just want green papaya salad[aka the chatfic in which Baekhyun just wants friends, Chanyeol is crushing hard, Minseok is a bit too friendly, Sehun talks about food too much, Jongdae is suspicious of everyone, Jongin doesn't know what's going on but just rolls with it, Yixing flirts with everyone, Kyungsoo doesn't want to be involved, and Joonmyun is constantly being ignored.]





	1. Chapter 1

**Baek_again** has created a group chat

 **Baek_again**  has invited  **tolgayandhandsome** , **chogiwtf** ,  **kaching_kaching, dance_till_you're_dead,**  and 4 others to the chat

 **Baek_again**  has renamed the chat  **welcome to whatever this is**

 **dance_till_you're_dead** :  
can i ask

 **Baek_again** :  
yes of course my new best friend :D

 **dance_till_you're_dead** :  
...  
nvm im not gonna ask

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
I don't rmbr giving anyone my number recently

 **Baek_again:**  
;)

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
???

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
hi I'm in class lmfaooo what's this

 **not_interested:**  
sehun?

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
ohh heyy kyungsoo my brotha  
what's cooking

 **not_interested:**  
idfk...  
@Baek_again what is this all about if u don't mind me asking

 **Baek_again:**  
╮(￣ω￣;)╭

 **kukukukuku:**  
lmfao who tf is @tolgayandhandsome

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
that would be me   
oh sehun  
and who r u

 **kukukukuku:**  
yixing

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
I dont know u but nice  
@Baek_again and who r u

 **Baek_again:**  
byun Baekhyun at ur service

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
at my service?   
nice   
could u order me some thai food   
I haven't eaten in twelve hours

 **Baek_again:**  
byun baekhyun at ur service, so long as ur requests don't involve manual labor

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
it's not manual labor I just want green papaya salad

 **kaching_kaching:**  
I don't recognize any of these names does someone have a wrong number

 **Baek_again:**  
nope

 **kaching_kaching:**  
???

 **chogiwtf:**  
hi

 **Baek_again:**  
hi :D  
welcome to whatever this is

 **not_interested:**  
u don't even know?

 **Baek_again:**  
it's a social experiment

 **not_interested:**  
...

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
ooh ooh kyungsoo say the thing   
say that thing u always say

 **not_interested:**  
thanks but I'm not interested

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
that's the one   
gets me every time,,

 **not_interested** has left the chat

 **Baek_again** has invited  **not_interested** to the chat

 **not_interested:**  
wtf dude...

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
in @not_interested's defense this is a little,,  
strange   
I mean clearly none of us know who u are   
y do we have a reason to stay or trust that you're not just some weirdo

 **Baek_again:**  
uhh  
well I could introduce myself would that help

 **kaching_kaching:**  
that's a good place to start

 **Baek_again:**  
ok   
well   
my name is Byun Baekhyun like I said earlier    
I go to Daesung Uni  
I like long walks on the beach and confusing ppl with aheoflsnx

 **not_interested:**  
confusing ppl with what?

 **Baek_again:**  
exactly

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
lmao he's funny I like him   
also kyungsoo and I go to Daesung uni 2 what a coincidence

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
same

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
same

 **kaching_kaching:**  
same...

 **chogiwtf:**  
same

 **kukukukuku:**  
I think it's safe to say we all do   
hmmm  
does this have anything to do with the social experiment u mentioned?

 **Baek_again:**  
maybe  
maybe not

 **kaching_kaching:**  
ur rly suspicious dude...  
what do u even look like   
for all we know u could be some gross sixty year old pervert trying to hit on a bunch of younger men

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
eww I didn't even consider that  
yeah show us a picture of u   
but w/ some kind of specification so we know ur not just stealing the photo from someone

 **chogiwtf:**  
finger heart

 **Baek_again:**  
finger heart?  
ok I can do that  
[image sent]

**marshmallow_boi:**  
oh hey u don't look sixty years old :D  
maybe ur not suspicious after all  
let's be friends !!

 **Baek_again:**  
:D

 **not_interested:**  
I still think he's sketchy

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
Kyungsoo u think everyone who isn't me is sketchy

 **kukukukuku:**  
lmfaoo exposed   
sehun what do u look like

 **kaching_kaching:**  
is this a dating website now   
is that what the social experiment is

 **Baek_again:**  
lolol no I didn't plan this

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
[image sent]

**kukukukuku:**  
zayum u r pretty handsome dude

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
y thank u

 **not_interested:**  
sehunie if ur in class don't take pictures ur raising the risk of getting caught using ur phone...

 **Baek_again:**  
is anyone else here in class currently

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
I am

 **kukukukuku:**  
and what do  _u_ look like

 **kaching_kaching:**  
is it ur mission to uncover everyone's faces all of a sudden

 **kukukukuku:**  
I'm a curious fella   
In fact   
everyone here should do a face reveal   
for my amusement

 **kaching_kaching:**  
ur friends w/ baekhyun aren't u   
ur in on this "social experiment"

 **kukukukuku:**  
never met the dude in my life   
anyway  
face reveals lets go fellas

 **not_interested:**  
no thanks I'm not interested

 **kukukukuku:**  
cool  
[image sent]

       
this me   
I nominate @dance_till_you're_dead  to go next

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
but I'm in class...

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
the other guy did it

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
sehun   
"the other guy" 's name is sehun

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
idk I feel kinda weird sharing photos of myself with strangers

 **Baek_again:**  
we won't be strangers for long :)

 **kaching_kaching:**  
ok now that just sounds creepy

 **Baek_again:**  
:(  
I'm not creepy I swear   
@dance_till_you're_dead  what's ur name ?

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
Kim Jongin

 **Baek_again:**  
what's everyone else's names?   
who haven't introduced themselves already, I mean

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
[image sent]  
  
I'm Minseok~ :)  
it's nice to meet everyone

 **kaching_kaching:**  
I'm Jongdae   
and same here, I guess...  
emphasis on the tentativeness

 **Baek_again:**  
is there anyone else?

 **chogiwtf:**  
park chanyeol

 **Baek_again:**  
would  _u_ care to share a photo

 **chogiwtf:**  
uh  
I mean

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
don't be shy sweetheart

 **not_interested:**  
sweetheart??  
sehunie do u and him know each other??

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
no lmao

 **kukukukuku:**  
lmao  
picture  
picture  
picture   
show us ur face chanyeol   
none of us bite

 **kaching_kaching:**  
how would u know u don't know everyone here do u

 **kukukukuku:**  
r u implying u bite

 **kaching_kaching:**  
no

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
kyungsoo y don't u share a pic   
u cute af

 **not_interested:**  
I'm not sharing my selcas with a bunch of strangers

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
im not a stranger tho

 **not_interested:**  
u don't count

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
do 2  
fate brought us all 2gether...

 **Baek_again:**  
no I did :)  
but fate works too we'll go with that

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
[image sent]  
  
everyone this is my friend kyungsoo   
isn't he cute

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
he is

 **kukukukuku:**  
hey there cutie

 **not_interested:**  
sehunie cmon...

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
he's single as a Pringle and is looking for love   
can I have three bachelors to volunteer   
any three of u   
ok I'm nominating yixing, minseok, and jongin since I forget everyone else's names   
bachelor number one sell urself in ten seconds kyung is a busy guy

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
uh

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
quiet bachelor number three it's not ur turn yet

 **kukukukuku:**  
hi I'm bachelor number one,  
kyungsoo if u choose me u wouldn't regret it ;)

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
weak I expected more from u   
ok bachelor #2 lets go

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
love the headband, kyungsoo :D

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
also weak but better than bachelor #1

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
uh

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
aaand ur outta time   
oh  
and so am I   
lmao my class just ended

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
so did mine

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
oh is that so,,  
lemme see ur face Jongin

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
[image sent]  


**tolgayandhandsome:**  
aHA   
I see u over there in the corner u gorgeous man  
so we share a class huh   
cool cool  
let's be friends dude

 **dance_till_you're_dead:  
** sure i guess

 **Baek_again:**  
byun baekhyun, creating friendships between strangers since 2k18

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
was this ur plan all along ??

 **Baek_again:**  
im not telling

 **kaching_kaching:**  
wtf man,,

*

*

**[welcome to whatever this is]**

**suhohoho:**  
whats this?  
i dont understand i dont think im supposed to be here but i was invited to this gc for some reason  
.   
.  
.  
hello  
.  
.  
.  
this is a prank isnt it  
not again...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't judge me i need humor to distract me from depression so here we gooo~ ☆ﾐ(o*･ω･)ﾉ


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im tryna focus mainly on my other chatfic so these updates will be slower but hopefully still fairly often

**[welcome to whatever this is]**

**tolgayandhandsome:  
** @suhohoho  
sry dude no one's typically up at 3 am so no one could reply to ur text lmao  
oh wait  
it's 3 am now  
u sent that 3 hours ago  
guess i didnt realize or open the gc lolol  
i forget there even was a gc  
is anyone else awake

 **chogiwtf:**  
yeah

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
woah srsly??  
i wasnt expecting anyone to actually respond  
y r u awake it's 3 am

 **chogiwtf:**  
i have off and on insomnia

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
i see...  
well i dont rly hav a good excuse lmao

 **kaching_kaching:  
** wtf u guys  
i fell asleep w/ the volume of my phone all the way up and so ur text messages woke me tf up

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
cool  
whats ur name again

 **kaching_kaching:**  
jongdae  
im muting this chat and going back to sleep

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
cool  
gnight jongdae  
so like @chogiwtf  
sry im bad w/ names whats urs again

 **chogiwtf:**  
chanyeol

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
cool im sehun

 **baek_again:**  
and im baekhyun :D

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
oh hey if it isnt the man himself  
whats ur excuse for being awake

 **baek_again:**  
same as jongdae lol  
but i dont have to get up early tomorrow morning so i have no reason to mute the chat  
besides i would never do that anyway, i created this thing after all :)

 **chogiwtf:  
** hi

 **baek_again:**  
hi :D  
chanyeol, right?

 **chogiwtf:**  
yeah

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
in case u didnt scroll up dude says he's got insomnia

 **baek_again:**  
aw rly?  
that sucks :/

 **chogiwtf:**  
its not constant, just off and on   
u dont have to feel sorry for me

 **baek_again:  
** still,,

 **tolgayandhandsome:  
** so wut do u look like chanyeol u never showed ur face yesterday my dude  
i like putting faces to names cmon,,

 **chogiwtf:**  
i dont know...  
i dont rly take the best selcas

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
me neither dude dw

 **chogiwtf:  
** i mean,  
i guess if u insist  
[image sent]  


**tolgayandhandsome:  
** oh wow dude u rly do look tired,,

 **baek_again:**  
wait a second  
ur that guy i spoke to the other day

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
lmao u know him?

 **baek_again:  
** well no  
technically  
it's just  
well for the social experiment i asked ppl for the number(s) of one or more of their friends and he was one of the ppl i asked

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
oohhhhhh  
lmao chanyeol so u gave him ur own #

 **chogiwtf:**  
it was an accident  
did i ruin the social experiment...

 **baek_again:**  
lolol no chanyeol ur good :)

 **chogiwtf:**  
u sure

 **baek_again:**  
totally, dw about it

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
so can u explain wut exactly the social experiment is lmao u keep just calling it that but u havent said

 **baek_again:**  
it's a secret ;)

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
lmfao  
if u say so dude

*

*

**[welcome to whatever this is]**

**marshmallow_boi:**  
goooood mornnning everyone

 **kukukukuku:**  
morning minseok  
and how r u doin?? ;)

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
good thanks :D

 **kaching_kaching:**  
do u guys have to flirt here

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
we're not flirting

 **kukukukuku:**  
well i am lmao

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
morning dudes  
hey @chogiwtf   
did u end up getting any sleep last night man

 **chogiwtf:**  
an hour and fifteen minutes

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
nice

 **baek_again:**  
thats kinda sad...

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
u only slept an hour and fifteen minutes?? :o  
u poor soul  
studying too much?

 **chogiwtf:**  
insomnia

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
ow that sucks  
i had off and on insomnia for like two weeks when i was thirteen  
not fun

 **chogiwtf:**  
im fine dw

 **dance_till_you're_dead:**  
if u say so dude

 **kaching_kaching:**  
are u guys here all suddenly friends or smth i dont get it

 **kukukukuku:**  
whats wrong w/ being alittle friendly and showing concern for another human being,man 

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
yes preach  
uh

 **kukukukuku:**  
yixing

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
thats the one 

 **suhohoho:**  
hi no one answered my question b4 what is this

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
who u

 **suhohoho:**  
junmyeon  
and as far as i know i don't know anyone here so im rly confused...

 **kaching_kaching:**  
we r 2 dude

 **kukukukuku:**  
show ur face

 **suhohoho:**  
im sorry?

 **kukukukuku:**  
ur face  
show it

 **suhohoho:**  
?  
again, i don't know u guys y would i do that

 **kukukukuku:**  
cuz the rest of us did  
or most of us rather  
cmon it's part of the social experiment

 **kaching_kaching:**  
so u  _are_ in on it

 **kukukukuku:**  
no i swear im not

 **suhohoho:**  
look can i just have a explanation

 **kukukukuku:**  
show ur face  
show ur face  
show ur face

 **suhohoho:**  
ur ignoring me...  
look if i show my face will someone tell me what this is about

 **baek_again:**  
absolutely :D

 **suhohoho:**  
fine...  
[image sent]  


**kukukukuku:**  
well hello there handsome

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
what's "exo" mean

 **suhohoho:**  
idk it was just on the hat 

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
cool 

 **suhohoho:**  
so is anyone gonna tell me now  
what's this gc for  
.  
.  
.  
hello??  
wtf...

*

*

**[Sehun and Kyungsoo private chat]**

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
kyung  
did u open the group chat by any chance  
if u awake that is

 **not_interested:**  
i just did...

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
the picture  
that guy  
junmyeon  
i had to go back and check  
anyway  
he's the same person  
that guy i told u i've been crushing on from a distance

 **not_interested:**  
u mean the one u said u share a class with and passed by in the halls a ton of times??

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
yeah him  
i finally know his name this is progress,,

 **not_interested:**  
have u talked to him in person b4

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
nope lmao  
but this should be a lot easier  
texting, i mean

 **not_interested:**  
just don't say anything weird ok  
he already seems suspicious of the chat  
kinda like most of us do...

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
right  
don't say anything weird  
got it

*

*

**[welcome to whatever this is]**

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
@suhohoho  is ur name ariel  
cuz i think we mermaid for each other

 **suhohoho:**  
no i said my name was junmyeon  
y does nobody listen to me

*

*

**[Sehun and Kyungsoo private chat]**

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
it didnt work

 **not_interested:**  
what did i just say...


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was bored so i decided to actually update this lmao

**[welcome to whatever this is]**

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
if anybody happens to find a pack of colorful post it notes w/ drawings of dogs on them  
it's mine  
and imma need it back

**marshmallow_boi:**  
are u an art major?

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
no  
but ty for assuming im good enough at art to get into a good college

**baek_again:**  
so what do u major in then?

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
same thing as jongin

**baek_again:**  
that doesnt answer the question lmfao since i dont know what he majors in either

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
take a wild guess

**baek_again:**  
hmm  
photography?

**kaching_kaching:**  
oh my gosh hes an idiot

**baek_again:**  
ohhhhh  
danceeee  
i get it now  
cool :D  
so u and sehun r both dance majors thats awesome

**kaching_kaching:**  
whats ur major

**baek_again:**  
music production :)))

**marshmallow_boi:**  
im a culinary student :D  
whats urs jongdae?

**kaching_kaching:**  
bold of u to assume id tell u

**marshmallow_boi** :  
oh but why not??

**kaching_kaching:**  
idk

**marshmallow_boi:**  
do u still think baekhyun isnt a trustworthy guy?  
he doesnt seem all that sketchy to me  
i think u should loosen up and have some fun with this :)

**kaching_kaching:**  
well  
i mean wtvr   
i would say that revealing my major just makes me more vulnerable to being stalked by that guy but we're majoring in the same course so it'd be kinda hard to avoid it anyway...

**baek_again:**  
WAIT RLY???  
I DONT REMEMBER SEEING U

**kaching_kaching:**  
...its a big class  
not rly that surprising u havent seen me

**baek_again:**  
still,,

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
um hello my post it notes

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
havent seen em dude

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
i bet u didnt even look

**not_interested:**  
sehunie y would he look for a pack of post it notes b4 knowing u even lost them  
scratch that no one should have to look for smth u lost anyway  
be more responsible

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
um mean kyung we're homies now he doesnt mind   
right jongin

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
well to be completely honest w/ u i think trying to find smth like that would take a lot of time and effort

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
if no one helps me find those post it notes im gonna flip  
and ill order a boat load of food and then send u guys pictures of me eating the food just to rub it in ur face and make u feel guilty for not helping  
kinda like that story  
the red piglet or smth

**chogiwtf:**  
red hen

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
eyyyyy its ma boi  
also yeah red hen thats the one  
hey chanyeol u wouldnt by any chance have seen a pack of post it notes around lately  
dog drawings

**chogiwtf:**  
no sorry

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
curses

**suhohoho:**  
post it notes?

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
sehun did u try looking for them urself yet

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
of course i have  
*n't

**suhohoho:**  
hello

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
oh hello junmyeon what a pleasant surprise

**suhohoho:**  
i found a pack of post it notes near my desk in music study so i picked them up and put them in my backpack   
so theyre urs then?

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
oh my gosh marry me  
what  
who sent that  
baekhyun u hacker lmao

**baek_again:**  
i dont know how to hack  
i can hacky sack tho

**kaching_kaching:**  
and im sure that'll get u far in life

**baek_again:**  
thank you :)

**suhohoho:**  
uh  
so ur name is sehun right @tolgayandhandsome

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
the one and only  
ahaha well thats untrue  
im sure there are a handful of other guys named sehun  
but none are quite as tol or gay or handsome as i ahahaha

**not_interested:**  
sehun pls stop talking im about to be in pain

**suhohoho:**  
so to my understanding u rly want these post it notes back right

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
yes i do  
is there a condition to u giving them back  
do i have to shave my head or smth  
pls dont make me do that i have beautiful locks

**not_interested:**  
_sehun pls_

**suhohoho:**  
lmao y would there be a condition  
i was just gonna say could u remind me what u look like so i can give them to u next time i see u

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
oh  
okay thats not so bad  
[image sent]  


**suhohoho:**  
ok thx i'll keep an eye out for u sehun

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
ahahahahahahh kayyyyy

**kaching_kaching:**  
i can hear the nervous gay laughter

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
fite me jonggay

**kaching_kaching:**  
did u just

**baek_again:**  
i think he did

**kaching_kaching:**  
im not gay

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
right  
we can change that  
i'll just show u pictures of kyung  
my boi can turn anyone gay

**not_interested:**  
oh sehun i swear if u do

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
[image sent]  
  
i know i know  
youve changed ur mind havent u

**baek_again:**  
a microphone and headphones??  
kyungsoo r u majoring in music production 2???

**not_interested:**  
...i am

**baek_again:**  
:D  
its a small world

**chogiwtf:**  
...after all

**baek_again:**  
lol nice one chanyeol

**chogiwtf:**  
...thank u

**kaching_kaching:**  
i didnt think it was possible to  _sound_ shy over text  
but youve done it

*

*

**dance_till_youre_dead** has started a chat with  **tolgayandhandsome**

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
i know this is gonna sound rly gay  
but is ur friend single

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
boi u rite dat is pretty gay  
and kyungsoo  
coincidentally  
is also a pretty gay

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
ok but is he single

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
i said b4 that he was  
however  
disclaimer   
good luck in getting him to like u

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
...  
ngl  
that hurt

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
wait no i didnt mean it like that lmfaoooooo  
i just meant that kyung isnt very social   
well w/ anyone besides me  
like he's just   
not interested

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
has he ever dated anyone b4

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
nope  
but go for it man  
if ur skillful  
maybe u could be the first  
but tbh w/ u despite knowing him for almost fourteen years i dont know if he has a "type"  
he's an absolute babe tho u agree

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
whats said in this chat remains in this chat correct

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
correct ma brotha

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
hes rly freaking cute

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
i told ya  
aint a man alive kyung cant turn gay

*

*

**[welcome to whatever this is]**

**baek_again:**  
ooh chanyeol i just realized u never mentioned wut u major in

**chogiwtf:**  
oh  
well  
its   
not rly important

**baek_again:**  
awww but cant u tell us anyway??  
i think we all shared ours at this point

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
nuh uh yixing didnt  
where is that lil devil anyway  
@kukukukuku

**kukukukuku:**  
u called

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
major

**kukukukuku:**  
art and design ufufufu

**baek_again:**  
that leaves chanyeol~~~

**chogiwtf:**  
im  
photography...

**baek_again:**  
rly????  
thats cOOL AF

**chogiwtf:**  
um   
thank u very much i like it too

**kaching_kaching:**  
fr y does chanyeol sound like a cute shy child

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
aHA u r gay i win

**kaching_kaching:**  
...?

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
u called chanyeol cute  
baekhyun as the host of the gc u can change ppls names right

**baek_again:**  
yes i can :)

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
be a good sport and change jongdae's to smth more appropriate

**baek_again** has renamed  **kaching_kaching** as  **swiggetyswayjongdaeisgay**

**swiggetyswayjongdaeisgay:**  
kill me


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's quarter of one in the morning what am i doing lmfao

**[Sehun and Kyungsoo private chat]**

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
junmyeon  
said  
hi  
TO ME  
YA BOI  
SEHUN  
AND HE DIDNT PASS OUT  
sehun i mean  
mE  
YA BOI DIDNT PASS OUT  
goshaksjgieals hes so handsome  
junmyeon i mean  
well i am too but im not here to talk about me  
kyung pls respond

 **not_interested:**  
what am i supposed to say

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
idk "good job" or "proud of u" or smth  
oh and another thing  
he told me the little dog doodles i did on the post it notes were cute  
thats like  
one degree of separation away from calling me cute  
we're practically married ahh

 **not_interested:**  
...  
good for u sehun

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
omgee ty i love how in support of our relationship u r

 **not_interested:**  
what relationship

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
ours  
anyway  
oh i almost forgot  
jongin and i went for coffee and kibitzed  
he's cool,,

 **not_interested:**  
kibitzed

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
it means talk

 **not_interested:**  
i know what it means sehunie  
ive just never heard or seen u use that word b4

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
its fun to say  
kibitz  
kibitz  
jongins cool

 **not_interested:**  
u said that already

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
well he is  
u should join us for coffee next time

 **not_interested:**  
no thx

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
y not kyung??  
u luv coffee  
u ever hear of starbucks

 **not_interested:**  
sehunie even newborn babies know starbucks

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
oh ok  
well we went to starbucks  
they got that salterd carmle stuff u lyke

 **not_interested:**  
salterd carmle

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
yeh salterd carmle  
i tried sum of jongins cuz he got that  
iz aight  
im more of a basic psl kinda gal

 **not_interested:**  
a what

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
dont pretend u dont know all the coffee lingo kyung   
go on   
tell me what a psl is

 **not_interested:**  
.  
.  
.  
pumpkin spice latte

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
there ya go  
proud of u,,

 **not_interested:**  
yeah wtvr  
i gotta study now ill talk to u later sehunie

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
ew yeah me too 

 **not_interested:**  
ur a dance major

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
by study i meant study world of warcraft lore  
jongin told me to

 **not_interested:**  
ur just gonna do wtvr jongin tells u 2?

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
pfft no im a strong independent korean man i dont take orders from no one

*

*

**[Jongin and Sehun private chat]**

**dance_till_youre_dead:**  
u studying up on that wow lore

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
about to

 **dance_till_youre_dead:**  
add dark souls to that list i just purchased the dlc and u told me youve never played it b4

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
got it chief

*

*

**[Sehun and Kyungsoo private chat]**

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
ok now ive got two things to study for

 **not_interested:**  
?

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
oof being a college student is so hard,,

 **not_interested:**  
...talk to u later 

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
yep

*

*

*

*

**[welcome to whatever this is]**

**marshmallow_boi:**  
whats a chimichanga

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
idk but it sounds delicious

 **swiggetyswayjongdaeisgay:**  
thats a rly random question but it is a food  
ah ffs i forgot this was still my name

 **kukukukuku:**  
lmfao rip man

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
it shall remain till u admit there isnt a straight bone in ur body

 **swiggetyswagjongdaeisgay:**  
u hardly even know me why tf r u so insistent on this

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
idk honestly  
oh and youve never shown ur face yet here lol i just realized

 **Baek_again:**  
:0 oh thats right,, he hasnt,,

 **swiggetyswayjongdaeisgay:**  
and i wont

 **Baek_again** : **  
** what if i agree to change ur name

 **swiggetyswagjongdaeisgay:**  
change it first  
then i'll consider it

 **Baek_again** has renamed  **swiggetyswagjongdaeisgay** as  **jongdae**

 **jongdae:**  
thank u

 **Baek_again:**  
.  
.  
.  
picture?

 **jongdae:**  
no

 **Baek_again** has renamed  **jongdae** as  **gaylord9000**

 **gaylord9000:**  
u oversized child  
fine  
[image sent]  
  
ok change the name now

 **Baek_again** has renamed  **gaylord9000** as  **gaylord10000**

 **gaylord10000:**  
next time i see u irl i'll actually throw a book at ur face

 **Baek_again** has renamed  **gaylord10000** as  **salty_dae**

 **salty_dae:**  
...wtvr idec

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
would u be weirded out if i said i think ur the prettiest boy ive ever seen 

 **salty_dae:**  
uh  
no i guess not  
just   
confused

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
omgee minseoks a bold boi im inspired

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
confused???

 **salty_dae:**  
yeah

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
confused?????????????????????  
listen here i know a pretty face when i see one dare i say im an expert

 **salty_dae:**  
r u saying u have a pretty face

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
no thats not what i meant

 **chogiwtf:**  
i believe hes trying to say he has good taste in men

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
LMFAO

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
NO CMON IM JUST COMPLIMENTING HIM DONT TAKE IT ANOTHER WAY  
dont tell me ur insecure about ur looks jongdae is that y ur confused??

 **salty_dae:**  
i dont really get called pretty by boys

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
boys are dumb

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
u is boy

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
yes am boy

 **salty_dae:**  
yeah a marshmallow boy apparently  
y marshmallow btw

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
cuz im soft and squishy on the inside :D

 **kukukukuku:**  
yeah and if u heat him up in the microwave he'll explode

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
its true  
and if u sandwich me between chocolate and graham crackers i make for a delicious snacc

 **salty_dae:**  
...ok?  
ur so odd...

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
and ur prettyyyyy

 **kukukukuku:**  
um excuse me minseok i believe flirting is my job

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
um excuse u im not flirting  
anyway jongdae we should get coffee :)

 **salty_dae:**  
y

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
cuz i wanna hang out with u,,

 **salty_dae:**  
y, cuz im pretty?

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
no cuz i like meeting new ppl and getting to know them and being around them im a very sociable person u see

 **salty_dae:**  
but there are many different options in terms of ppl 

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
;-; u rly dont wanna hang out with me do u...?  
im hurt...  
*sniff*  
wHAt dID i dO wROnG,,,

 **Baek_again** has renamed  **salty_dae** as  **evilheartbreaker666**

 **kukukukuku:**  
wouldnt it be funny if these names baekhyun is giving jongdae were actually his usernames for various websites

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
that would amuse me

 **evilheartbreaker666:**  
this is the stupidest thing

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
;-;

 **evilheartbreaker666:**  
look if i get coffee with u will u stop being such a drama queen i feel guilty and i shouldnt have to 

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
:D

 **chogiwtf:**  
cute

 **Baek_again:**  
lololol chanyeol


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> its almost been a month ofmslfks
> 
> in my defense, school + work + four other fics + other things idk = little time lmfao
> 
> well heres the fifth (unedited) chapter finally,,

**[Minseok and Minhyuk private chat]**

**marshmallow_boi:**  
minhyuk??  
MiNhYUk  
M I N H Y U K - A H

 **minmin:**  
YES

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
capital letters and spaces always get ur attention

 **minmin:**  
indeed  
so??  
what is it?

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
just a random question   
were u the one who gave my # to some random guy for a social experiment

 **minmin:**  
uh  
.  
.  
.  
yeah

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
t hank y o u

 **minmin:**  
???  
WAIT DONT TELL ME U HOOKED UP WITH HIM

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
omg no baekyun's cute but not my type  
but someone else I met thru baekhyun

 **minmin:**  
soooos u gots a bf??

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
ughh I wish   
I spent one afternoon with him and I'm in love   
that's bad right

 **minmin:**  
could be  
is he gay

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
u see there's where a problem is

 **minmin:**  
oh noo minseok ;-;  
did u go and fall for a straight man?

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
look I'm still tryna hold on to the possibility that maybe he's just in the closet??  
I'm rly hoping???   
ahejdjwiehbqvdjdoa minhyuk he's the prettiest boy I've ever seen   
when he looked into my eyes I swear my heart melted this is prOBaBly rEaLLy bAd

 **minmin:**  
h a n g i n t h e r e m i n s e o k i e

*

*

**[welcome to whatever this is]**

**tolgayandhandsome:**  
@marshmallow_boi  
@evilheartbreaker666  
not that it's any of my business  
but have u guys gone on ur date yet   
I'm on the edge of my seat

 **chogiwtf:**  
same

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
yess my man,,  
we wants detes

 **evilheartbreaker666:**  
wtf...  
it wasn't a date   
we just got coffee

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
listen I've read enough fan fictions to know coffee usually leads to dating,,

 **evilheartbreaker** **666** **:**  
u must have forgotten that time I stressed that I was s t r a i g h t

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
a l t e r n a t i v e  f a c t .

 **chogiwtf:**  
but did u enjoy urself tho   
that's what's important

 **evilheartbreaker666:**  
...ur so weird chanyeol   
I mean sure I guess I did

 **kukukukuku:**  
babies in a week   
I'm predicting it

 **baek_again:**  
who's having a baby????

 **evilheartbreaker666:**  
nobody here.   
as we are all men.  
incapable of delivering children.   
as that is a capability solely of women.   
and none of us here  
are women.

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
A L T E R N A T I V E  F A C T   
I am a women

 **not_interested:**  
this is news to me

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
sorry for keeping it from u for so long kyung

 **dance_till_youre_dead:**  
if ur a woman isn't ur name inaccurate

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
um no?

 **dance_till_youre_dead:**  
then if ur gay that means you like women

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
what no I like men

 **dance_till_youre_dead:**  
so that would mean you're straight

 **evilheartbreaker666:**  
oh wow hey same

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
hA no???  
nice try jonggay

 **evilheartbreaker666:**  
...I literally do not understand u   
btw baekyun can u change my name pls ?   
I'm cringing every time I see it

 **baek_again:**  
mmmmmm since u went on a date with minseok after being mean to him I suppose so,,

 **evilheartbreaker666:**  
it wasn't. a date.

 **baek_again** has renamed  **evilheartbreaker666** as  **jongdae**

 **jongdae:**  
ty

 **baek_again:**  
wait did u want ur name to be smth different  
like smth cooler than just ur name  
if u think of smth i can change it again

 **jongdae:**  
...my name is fine

 **baek_again:**  
but its ur real name, thats borin   
how bout kaching kaching thats what u had b4 right?

 **jongdae:**  
thats rly just an inside joke with a friend of mine u dont have to change it back  
also whats wrong with my real name??

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
change it back to jonggay   
i like that better

 **jongdae:**  
too bad

 **chogiwtf:**  
what did u do with minseok

 **jongdae:**  
u make it sound like i killed him

 **kukukukuku:**  
lmao  
did u ?

 **jongdae:**  
no u idiot  
and i didnt do anything with him  
idk where he is

 **marshmallow_** **boi:**  
im here :D

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
r u tho??  
or did jonggay, in his rage, murder u and is now pretending to be u by texting thru ur phone??

 **kukukukuku:**  
send cute pic as proof of living status

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
[image sent]  
  
:D alive and well lmao

 **chogiwtf:**  
is that a bunny

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
no thats me  
oh wait u meant what im doing with my hand,,   
yes i guess it is a bunny  
or a wolf??  
i actually dont know

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
so minseok how did the date go

 **jongdae:**  
it wasnt a date

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
it was gr8 :D

 **jongdae:**  
it wasnt

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
D: u didnt enjoy urself??  
iM sOrRYyyakkgja;jkl;dsfjJKLAJSDK

 **jongdae:**  
no thats,,  
i just meant it wasnt a date  
the coffee was good  
and ur cool i guess

 **dance_till_youre_dead:**  
"i guess"  
rough

 **jongdae:**  
mind yo business

 **marshmallow_boi:**  
well anyhowsit i certainly had a good time jongdae !  
i hope you'll tolerate me enough to endure a second coffee date ! :)

 **jongdae:**  
no date

 **kukukukuku:**  
thats two letters away from just "date"

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
yes exactly precisely u took the words out of my mouth yixing

 **jongdae:**  
y'all are the most obnoxious  
how do any of u have friends

 **chogiwtf:**  
so saturday then?

 **jongdae:**  
w  
are u asking on behalf of minseok or smth now??

 **tolgayandhandsome:**  
hes just tryna help u out fam chill

 **chogiwtf:**  
its true  
i dont like seeing ppl fight

 **jongdae:**  
we werent fighting??

 **chogiwtf:**  
thats good.

 **baek_again:**  
:D im so glad all of u guys are getting along uwu  
wait !  
kyungsoo?

 **not_interested:**  
hes not here right now

 **baek_again:**  
ohh ok  
tell him when he gets back we're all waiting on him to join the convo  
he doesnt say much :/

 **not_interested:  
** k

 **baek_again:**  
:)

 **tolgayhandsome:**  
that was kyung's answering machine

 **baek_again:**  
?? u can have answering machines for text messages??

 **jongdae:**  
u r quite possibly the biggest idiot ive ever known  
also unrelated to that but wasnt there one other person in this chat who's been quiet

 **suhohoho:**  
yeah that would be me  
i mean i still dont know why im here but u guys are kinda funny so i stick around

 **baek_again:**  
?  
i dont remember adding u to the chat...

 **suhohoho:**  
u know what i take back what i said

 

 

 

 


End file.
